求五人英语搞笑话剧求搞笑的英语话剧剧本至少十分钟五人或以上要中英对照

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《孔雀东南飞》（英文搞笑话剧）焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort) 焦母Johnny’smother(JMforshort)刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort) 太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC) Prologue (J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪) J:EverybodysaysthatI’mhenpecked,butinfact,I’masstrongasatiger,(小声)whilemy wifeisWuSong. (指着上台处的门大声道)I’mnotafraidofyou! (内砸出一脸盆,Ｊ接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’mafraidofwhom? MywifeLunchisthemostfamouswomanintheneighbor-hood.Sheisbraverthanme, smarterthanmeandstrongerthanme.AllthisIdonotcare.Ionlywanthertobetender thanme.Butsheisnot!Havingawifelikethisisjustlikelivinginthehell! (内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J) MyGod!Whocanhelpme?(下) Act1 (序幕结束时,JM作窃听状) JM(拄拐棍上):Ican! (对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Whereareyou? L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’mhere!What’supmum? JM:I’vetoldyouagainandagainthatyoushouldcallme“mymostbeautifulgracefuland dearestmother-in-law”. L:OK.Mymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother-in-law,what’sup? JM:Sinceyoumarriedmysonyouhavebehavedsobadly.Youhavebeensorude,sobrusque,so lazy…… L:But…… JM:Neverinterruptme! L:Neverinterruptme!SinceImarriedyourson,thatterribleJohnny,Ihavebeenworkinghardall daylong,cookingandwashing.Ihaveraisedtensofthousandsofpigsandducksandchicken and…… JM:Butallthoseyouhavedonearenotasvaluableasagrandson! L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,youwantagrandson,don’tyou?(开始解围裙)Goandaskyour son.I’mleaving!(扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下) Act2 (LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上) L:Mum,I’mback! LM:Youareback?Why?Whathappened? L:Iwaskickedoutbymymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother–in-law. LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!Ihavealreadytoldyou!Whenyouinsistedon marryingthatterribleJohnny,Itoldyouthatheisuglystupidandpoor,butyoudidnotlisten tome.Lookatyourself…… L:But,mum…… LM:Neverinterruptme! L:Mum,I’mnotinterruptingyou.IjustwanttotellyouthatyouarealwaysrightOK?And I’llmarrywhomeveryouwantmeto. LM(大喜):Nicegirl!Justnow,Imetthemayor’ssoninthemarket.Hesaid:“Ifyoudaughter Haven’tbeenmarried,Ireallyreallywanttomarryher!”Nowyouarefreeagain,I’llgo andtellhim.(下) L(惊愕):What?Themayor’sson?Themostfamousplayboyintheneighbor-hood?(手中的锅铲掉在地上)WhatasillythingIhavedone!(下) Act3 (J睡眼惺忪上) J(边走边道):Lunch!Lunch!Wherearemysocks? (走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Heretheyare!(闻一下) Er!Howsmelly!Theyarestilldirty! (突然想起)Lunchhasgone!Ihavetowashthemmyself. (他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I’msohungry!Butthere’snobreakfast!(捡起地上的围裙)ThisiswhatLunchalwayswears!Imisshersomuch,andherexcellentcookingskill!Now shehasgone.Ihavetocookformymotherandmyself. JM(上):Where’smybreakfast?Where’sLunch?Hasn’tshegotupyet? J:Mum,can’tyouremember?Lunchhasgone! JM(沉吟片刻):Well,totellyouthetruthJohnny,asonwithoutawifeisuseless.Lunchisanice girl,goandtakeherback! J(立正敬礼):Yesmadam! Act4 (J开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗) A:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous! Theroadisbuiltbyme!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上) B:AndIplantedonetree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上) C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet---(欲踩石头，但踩到了A的脚) AB&C:Giveusallyourmoney! J(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出１角硬币):Is1maoenough? (三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量) A:Whatbadluck!Thisguyisbroken! B:Ifwecannotrobanymoneytoday,wewillhavenothingtoeattonight! C:Iheardthatthemayor’ssonisgoingtomarryMissLiuLanzhinextmonth.WEcangoand robthewedding! A&B:Goodidea! J(惊讶):What?What?Lunchisgoingtogetmarried?It’simpossible! AB&C:Why?Aprettygirlandarichman,whatagoodcouple! J:ButLunchismywife!Wehaven’tgotdivorcedyet! (突然有了主意)I’vegotanidea!Youaregoingtorobthewedding,don’tyou?I’llgo withyou.YoutakethemoneyandItakethebride. B:Haveyougotanyexperience? J:No.ButI’vegotthis!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄１，０００，０００) Act5 (转眼已到了婚礼之期．MS意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，J盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台) (J和三强盗跃至台中) ABC&J:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous! A:Theroadisbuiltbyme! B:AndIplantedonetree. C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet--- J:Giveusallyourmoney! (L听到J的声音，掀起了盖头) L(惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到J的身边并躲到了的身后) (MS大怒，挥拳向J打来．J矮身一躲，MS打中了J身后的L，L晕倒) J(火冒三丈):Howdareyoubeatmywife!（挥拳向MS冲去） (J与MS混战，JM上，以拐杖击晕MS) (J将MS胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前) J(扶起L，关切地问):Honey,howareyou? L(哭状):Ihurtalot! J:Don’tcrybaby.I’llgoandfetchthemedicine. (下) L(起身去追):Waitforme! (跑下) (音乐起 CanYouCelebrate) ---【七夜、家==枯草】

求五人搞笑英语话剧剧本

搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》

搞笑
5
人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》

演员表：

西门吹雪

叶孤城

花满楼

打更的太监

旁白

道具：牛奶两袋，纸屑若干。

第一幕：决战乡村陌路

旁白：
A
quiet village is covered with white snow.
Birds are dancing in the cold.
A
man is walking along the street, step by step.
Wind is coming in silence.
Another mysterious man approaches.
打更的太监：
The weather is dry and things are flammable, take care not catch the fire! I
’
m
打酱
油的！

Y
与
X
相遇．

X
：
Ohm, I’m
sorry to knock you!
Y:
Ha-ha, Never mind baby.
X:
Excuse me, Could you tell me your name?
Y:
ha
ha,
I
won’t

change
my
name!
No
matter
what
happens.
I’m

the
most
famous
——
-Y
eGucheng
（登登登登！
！
！
）
. Who are you?
X:
I’m
ximenchuixue.
Y(
惊讶
): Ar, ximenchuixue?
X:
Y
es, what is wrong?
Y:
I heard that you are the best Martial Arts?
X:
Great, you know me!
Y(
抱腿
)
：
Please, please
……

Don
’
t kill me! Let me go!
X:
No, I must kill you!
Y:
I
don’t
want to be killed. Let me go!
X:
No way! Y
ou know?
Y(
突然站起冷冷的说
)
：
Don
’
t force me!
X:
Pardon!
(Y
拿出一袋牛奶
)
X(
抢过牛奶
):Milk, very good! I like drinking it.
Y:
Please drink it!
X(
喝完牛奶
):Thanks, ha-ha
Y:
Do you still want to kill me?
X:
Sure, must! Milk is milk.
Y(
恼怒
+
冷酷
):V
ery good! V
ery good! I hope you will not forget what you said!?
X:
I’m
sure I
won’t!

Y:
I must give you a lesson! If I
don’t
beat you this time, I
’ll
never be having properly! 3-2-1-0
X(
捂着肚子，蹲下
)
：
Ouch, Ouch!
Y(
大笑
)
：
Ha Ha
……

X(
可怜状
): Help! Help! Where is the washroom?
Y: What?
X: Toliet?
Y: What?
X: The
“WC”?

Y: Oh, I see, go along this street and turn right when you see a crossing road!
X: Thanks, bye-bye.
Y(
掏出纸屑吹
):This is genuine snow!
H: Stop! Protecting the environment is a basic obligation!
Y: Who are you?
H: Hua
—
man
—
-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?
Y: Yes, he was beaten by me and is in
“WC” now,

ha……

H(
惊讶
):Now you are the best in the world!
Y: Y
ou are right!
H: Teriffic! Y
ou are the one I
’
m looking for! Do you want to join in me?
Y: Yes,
It’s
very good.
H: Ok, follow me;
let’s
go!
Y: Ok,
Let’s go!

(To be continued
…
)

我从Arnold Lobel的小故事"Cookies"找到灵感,写下这段对话.感觉挺有意义的.

Will power意志力
Mike(M) Danny(C), Tommy(T)-classmates
地点:Scene-
in the college dorm大学宿舍
Danny is playing a computer game on his laptop. Tommy is sleeping.
Mike came back from a morning jogging.

M: hi, Dan, what are u doing?
D: I am playing war craft.
M: Where is Tommy?
D: Shi
!
M:What? What's the matter?
D: Don't u see? He is still sleeping.
M: My goodness! I can't believe this! It’s almost nine. He got to get up now. Don't u remember we are required to make up a three people dialogue for tomorrow's oral class?
D: Yes, I do. You wake up Tommy and I will play one more round of war craft.
M: You'd better stop playing right now. We don't have much time to prepare this dialogue. Tommy! Tommy! Wake up! Time to wake up!
T:five more minutes, please.
Mike: No way, Jose. Time really flies.We still have a lot to do. Hurry up.
T: (Tommy sits up in his bed) Can I lie down two more minutes, please, just two more minutes? when Danny finishes his game, I will be fine.(Yawns) I don't know why I am so so sleepy. (Tommy lies down again.)
M: Guys!
I am really angry now. Time waits for nobody. If you two don't stop what you are doing now, I will find somebody else to be my partners.
D and T: all right. All right. We listen to u.

M: That's more like it. We need will power.
D and T: what is will power?
M: Will power is trying hard not to do something that you really want to do.
D: You mean like trying not to play war craft?
Mike: right.
T: you mean like trying not to stay up late?
M: right.
Danny turns off his computer. Tommy gets up and goes to the bathroom.
Two minutes later the three maskeetters are working on their assignment.
Danny: Mike, can I take a little break? Let me play one round and we will continue our work?
Tommy: Mike, Can I lie down a minute? My back hurts.
Mike: Noo
! Let's finish our work first before we do other things. We need Will Power!

Danny and Tommy: that's true. We need Will Power! We listen to you. Ok. Let's go!

The end

搞笑吧

求五人英语搞笑话剧求搞笑的英语话剧剧本至少十分钟五人或以上要中英对照

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搞笑吧

求五人英语搞笑话剧 求搞笑的英语话剧剧本 至少十分钟 五人或以上 要中英对照

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求五人英语搞笑话剧求搞笑的英语话剧剧本至少十分钟五人或以上要中英对照