求几则英语小笑话，简短的，并配翻译，谢谢。
我的狗很聪明
womanB:my dog is cleverer than yours.
我的狗比你的聪明。
A:my dog buys newspapers for me ever day.
我的狗每天帮我买报纸。
B:i know that.
我知道。
A:why?i didn't tell you before!
为什么？我以前没告诉过你啊！
B:my dog tells me.
我的狗告诉我的。
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
Nest and Hair
My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom.
"What kind of bird?" my sister asked.
"I didn't see the bird, ma' am, only the nest," replied the child.
"Then, can you give us a description of the nest?" my sister encouraged her .
"Well, ma'am, it just resembles your hair. "
18.鸟窝与头发
我姐姐是一位小学老师。一次一个学生告诉她说一只鸟儿在教室外 的树上垒了个窝。
“是什么鸟呢？”我姐姐问她。
“我没看到鸟儿，老师，只看到鸟窝。”那孩子回答说。
“那么，你能给我们描述一下这个鸟巢吗？”我姐姐鼓励她道。
“哦，老师，就像你的头发一样。”
I've Just Bitten My Tongue
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.
"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"
"Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "
“我们有毒吗？”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。
“是的，亲爱的，”她回答说，“你问这个干什么？”
“因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。”
A Woman Who Fell
It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City's Grand Central Terminal - As I neared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes. Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure, she winked at me and said, "Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet?"
摔倒的女人
上下班高峰期，我匆匆奔向纽约豪华中心站去赶一趟火车。接近门口，一位肥胖的中年妇女从后面冲过来，没想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了脚，仰面滑倒了。她的惯性使她接近了我的脚。我正准备扶她，她却自己爬了起来。她镇定了一下，对我挤了一下眉，说道：“总是有漂亮女人拜倒在你脚下吗？”
1、谐趣篇
l will forget it
David:Have you forgotten that you owe me fifty dollars?
Tom:No!No yet.Give me time and l will.
我一定会忘记的
大卫：你忘了欠我的50美元了吗？
汤姆：不！还没有。给我些时间，我一定会忘记的。
2、校园篇
Correct
Techer:Tim,what are the three words which pupils use most often at school?
Tim:l...do not konw...
Teacher:Correct.
很对
老师：提姆，学生们在学校里常用的三个字是什么？
提姆：我...不知道...
老师：很对。
who is she
can i sit here? it is for my sister. who is your sister ? that girl. then you are my son .
what? she is my daughter .
haha!
How are you?
怎么是你？
How old are you?
怎么老是你？
求几则简短英文小笑话，并配翻译，谢谢
春天到了我和同学们一起去野外游玩。天空湛蓝湛蓝的，白云，悠然地飘在头顶，小鸟站在树枝上快乐地唱着歌，好像在欢迎我们的到来。 野外一片生机勃勃。绿油油的草地上，散落着几朵五颜六色的花，显得格外美丽；小河清澈见底，如一条长长的蓝绸子，一群小鱼从河里冒出来，你追我赶，一会儿沉进水底，一会儿浮出水面，欢快的做着游戏；远处的大山高耸入云，连绵起伏，也披上了一件绿色的外衣 春天的野外真美呀
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